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He’s probably learned through trial and error how long it takes someone to get to know him without his status getting in the way. A person can transmit HIV, but it's the virus that causes the infections.

If you’re offended he didn’t share his status in the first three messages, ask yourself what you haven't disclosed to him. Because HIV can have a long dormancy period, many HIV-positive people do not know exactly when they were exposed.

After all, we all have to be able to make ourselves happy first. Here are some ways to do that: Build a strong friendship network. Your interests, your talents, your unique personality, your compassion for others. When you’re happy with your life, and living it on your own terms, you are going to be that much more attractive to others. If you’re able to accomplish that much, then that’s a lot.

We need people in our life who care about us, and whom we care about, to be with during the good times and the hard times. By focusing too hard on something, we can end up getting in our own way. Instead of making finding a life partner your mission in life, make it your mission to have a quality life — quality in all areas of your life — right now and not sometime in the future (like when you have a partner).

The simple truth is that your HIV diagnosis affects the people in your life.

In the end you're not choosing to stay clean, you're choosing to stay ignorant. ” Let's get one thing straight: like orientation, race, or gender, HIV status does not define a person.To have a healthy relationship, I think it’s important to be comfortable with yourself, and confident in your ability to meet your own needs. You just have to keep putting yourself out there in the world. You’ll be that much more able to make someone else happy.Even to be able to face the future on your own and to not only be okay with that, but to feel like you have a quality life even if that means being single. So make it about getting to know someone new, to share a smile and few friendly words, and make the day a little more enjoyable. And if you’ve had a few disappointments along the way, you might also be wondering if having a partner is even in your future.In my experience, when you are living with HIV, getting connected with the right person is an inside job.

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